Wearing $1,200 high-tech "peak performance" tactical gear. He spends the entire hike critiquing everyone’s "form" while secretly being the most out of shape.
Is the "Sherpa." He’s carrying 80lbs of unnecessary protein powder and trying to perform "tactical ocular pat-downs" on nearby hikers.
“It’s not a crime if the mountain claims him, Charlie!”
Refuses to wear boots. He’s hiking in thermal underwear and "mountain-grease" to ward off "Summit Ghouls."
Chugging wine from a soda can and trailing 50 yards behind, shouting about "the hoors" he met in these woods in the 70s.
Wearing $1,200 high-tech "peak performance" tactical gear. He spends the entire hike critiquing everyone’s "form" while secretly being the most out of shape.
Is the "Sherpa." He’s carrying 80lbs of unnecessary protein powder and trying to perform "tactical ocular pat-downs" on nearby hikers.
“It’s not a crime if the mountain claims him, Charlie!”
Refuses to wear boots. He’s hiking in thermal underwear and "mountain-grease" to ward off "Summit Ghouls."
Chugging wine from a soda can and trailing 50 yards behind, shouting about "the hoors" he met in these woods in the 70s.